So, the news today might be evidence of actual madness, because, oh my god. I just created a new Youtube account with the intent of starting a vlog. I have been contemplating vlogging for a while, going back and forth between “that looks like fun/ it can’t be that hard, tons of people do it” to “who the hell wants to watch me talking at a camera? I don’t have a particularly interesting personality.” I know plenty of people will say they disagree with that last bit, yet I’m still on my own most of the time, so I don’t really know what to think about that. I don’t have a “thing” that would make my channel particularly interesting, I just have me.
I don’t want to vlog if no one’s going to watch the videos, because that’s going to be a lot of effort put into filming and editing that will feel wasted if no one sees them. The best thing to do, I guess, will be to approach it like I do with blogging–just make the videos I want to make, and hope that other people will like them, because if you aren’t doing it for yourself, then no one else is going to be interested.
The idea is a no-recipe vlog–that is, it will combine all of the content from this blog and Between Worlds. I will talk about writing, food, books, shopping (although I’ll try to refrain from hauls for the most part), clothing, and general life experiences. And whatever I want because that’s how we do down in the land of no recipes…
The reason it really seems like madness is twofold, both of those folds related to putting myself out there in that way. For one, I don’t like broadcasting my private life on the internet, which is why there are so many things I don’t post on facebook or on my blogs. So I’ll have to be careful about what gets revealed on the vlog. The second thing is all about my many insecurities and the potential to be rejected by literally EVERYONE in the world (who has access to Youtube). I would say more about that, but… it seems pretty self-explanatory.
I also have no idea how the hell I’ll ever be able to film a cooking video. I don’t have anyone I could coerce into helping me film, and my kitchen isn’t really set up so that I would be able to position my camera… anywhere, and actually catch the relevant action. And I can’t just cook with one hand. So until I can get some actual filming equipment (which might be never), that probably won’t happen.
I’m going to try to do video #1 in the next week or so, and it will probably be a general introducing myself video. And I guess we’ll see?
(…Oh, god. Why am I doing this?)
I’ve been feeling frowny today, not being completely unfocused but not as productive as I would like to be. Mustn’t get ahead of myself, though; maybe it won’t be so bad after all. To make a long story short, I’m very busy, and I probably will be until mid-June. More on that maybe next week…
You know what’s weird? Some places offer three sizes of cups, and others offer only two. Weird, right? You never know whether it’s small and regular, small and large, regular and large, or maybe they call regular “medium,” which doesn’t make much sense if there aren’t sizes on either side of it. They generally tell you on the menu what terms they use in that store, but I’m starting to be annoyed that I have to hunt for it at all. I think I advocate one-size beverage shops. No confusion. Just order the drink and they already know what size to make it.
And the places that have 4 sizes… they’re just asking for confused orders. Especially if they go by weight or volume. Someone wants the 12oz cup, and they order a small, but to you that means the 8oz, so then they get a smaller drink than they wanted. In some cases, hell breaks loose because there are people who really cannot handle not getting what they want.
(I so rarely get what I want that I can barely handle it when I do.)
These are not thoughts you should take seriously. I was thinking about stopping at Cafenation after work to see if I could snag any day-old bread. And maybe order a small iced tea. Or would it be a regular? …and things just kind of spiraled from there, as sometimes happens in the madness of Monday.